Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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