Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Who put my cat in the fridge?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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