Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
