i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
