I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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