there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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