so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
