and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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