Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize