Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
