Whod you bang
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize