I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
