hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
