Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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