He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
