I am in a vortex of obligation.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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