Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
