What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
