I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize