Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
and she was petting her beer can
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I want to be your penis for a week.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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