3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
