Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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