they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
