omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
PANTIES FOUND
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