Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
