I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
