What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
