whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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