...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize