Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
