life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
