It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
