I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Girls should come with a carfax report
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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