8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
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Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
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And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.