Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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