They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
