What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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