so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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