hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
