do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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