Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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