So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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