Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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