I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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