people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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