redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
