remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
