I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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