Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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