Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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