Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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