..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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