The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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